I’m learning that part of the Christian single life, there will be times of grief.  Just as there are times in life we are reminded of a loved one we have lost in the past, there are times I’m reminded of the life I thought I would have by now. I expected to be a wife and mother like most women my age are.

I find in myself conflicting emotions so often. I’m truly thankful for the life God has given to me; He continues to be so good and faithful to me.  Yet there are still many days my heart aches, missing the life I expected to have. Sometimes I ask God why my instincts to be a wife and a mom are still so strong when it appears that’s not part of God’s plans for me. I don’t know why.

But the older I get, the more I understand that these questions and emotions are a part of living in this world. Who among us has had their life turn out exactly as expected? It is my suspicion that every heart aches at different times for different things. The enemy of our soul loves to try to convince us that we are alone, that no one else can understand the aches and longings of our heart.

We are not alone though. I’ve had many conversations with both single and married friends that have proved to my hurting heart that my ultimate problem is not my single status, but it is the remaining desire to find my meaning and belonging in things other than Jesus.

Christ will always be our deepest need. 

What if God allows us to experience the aches and hurts of this world so that we are reminded of the only One who can truly satisfy? When our heart is grieved over life’s unexpected circumstances, we have a Savior who hears our cries for help and invites us to draw near to Him as He is drawing near to us.

In a strange way, I am learning to be thankful for the times I experience the aches of my heart for those are the times I experience the presence and comfort of God in deeper ways.  His grace is truly always sufficient. Because of Jesus, life can be joy-filled and full of meaning even when life isn’t going as expected.